


My Idol

by ionlywritefree



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: (uses he/him in this fic), Autistic!Yuuri, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Other, Stimming, also featuring, although I may just be paranoid, and mild transphobia, autistic!Viktor, because he is autistic too, nonbinary Yuuri, only a little bit of angst, such as ableism cw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-06
Updated: 2017-06-06
Packaged: 2018-11-09 17:18:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11109210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ionlywritefree/pseuds/ionlywritefree
Summary: Viktor was Yuuri's idol for many reasons. Yuuri had a list that kept on growing each year.





	My Idol

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come to my flat and kick my ass.

Reasons why I love Viktor Nikiforov:

1\. He is so good at skating! Watching him is so fun and I like when he spins around! I hope I can skate just like him one day!

Yuuri Katsuki found his new special interest in Viktor Nikiforov, and in a week flat he was already reciting trivia he found in magazines enthusiastically to his family. Mari giggled and called him Viktor's #1 fan. As long as Yuuri was happy, his parents were happy, although they didn't really understand his obsession with the young Russian figure skater.

To help them understand, Yuuri created a list.

2\. His hair is so long and pretty! I bet it's super soft! I want to touch it one day to find out!

Yuuri copied Viktor all the time. One day he learned the Russian word for "delicious" and would now shout "Vkusno!" after every meal. Him and Yuuko copied Viktor's performances every time they entered the rink. Yuuri also found himself wanting to grow his hair out just like Viktor, although he hesitated a bit more with that idea, not wanting to get teased. In the end, he decided against it, his anxiety getting the better of him. But this didn't stop him from braiding his sister's hair to look just like Viktor Nikiforov's.

He even asked his parents for a poodle, practically squealing and jumping with joy when they finally gave him permission. He named it after Viktor, of course. Vicchan was a daily reminder for the family that this obsession wasn't just a phase that would go away after a few months. This was a special interest that only grew in intensity as the years passed.

3\. His eyes are so pretty and his face is beautiful and-

Yuuri's adoration for Viktor Nikiforov was so pure and innocent that no one questioned Yuuri as he started asking for merchandise. Posters, mostly. They covered his bedroom walls, each one carefully placed and perfectly even. If any of his friends came over and took one look at his room, Mari knew that her brother would be teased relentlessly.

But Yuuri didn't have any friends, so they didn't have to worry about someone stumbling across his countless posters of the same attractive male teenager in very tight, glittery costumes.

4\. He's nice to fans, he's funny, and he's very smart!

Yuuri watched interviews with Viktor, having a bit of trouble focusing on the roughly translated Japanese subtitles. Viktor's voice was too distracting. His personality was just as bright as the yellow ribbon keeping his hair out of his face. Apparently he used to be on the chess team at his school. He knew a lot about chess. In fact, Viktor talked about the subject for five minutes before the interviewer awkwardly cut in and reminded him of the original question. Viktor just giggled and apologized.

"I'm sorry, I tend to ramble a lot. What were you asking again?"

Viktor was just so damn interesting. Yuuri could watch him all day long, and that's exactly what he did.

5\. The way he doesn't care about gender makes me think it's okay to be different.

As Yuuri got older, he tried to be more subtle about his admiration for Viktor Nikiforov.

If Mari ever heard him say that out loud, she'd laugh herself silly. Yuuri was far from subtle. Posters were still all over his room, magazines scattered on the floor, and if anyone interrupted him as he watched Viktor's competitions, there'd be hell to pay. Mari would tease him all the time about his big crush on Viktor, and Yuuri would turn bright red, shooting some childish comeback that didn't make much sense her way.

Being a teenager was tough. Hormones going wild, embarrassing phases, and unwanted expectations. At least Yuuri had Viktor to look up to. Viktor, with his cheerful smile and his optimistic outlook and gorgeous long hair and perfectly painted nails and the skirts and dresses he wore sometimes while he told the media that he just didn't care-

Yuuri wished he didn't care. Now, instead of looking at the posters on his walls with contentment, he looked in jealousy.

It's not fair... Yuuri thought as he found himself ransacking Mari's closet when she was away on a date with her girlfriend. Why can't Yuuri dress like this? Why can't Yuuri be a beautiful woman?

"Oh, I don't care about labels," Viktor said in an interview, wearing a sleek black miniskirt and bright yellow knee-highs. "Anyone can wear anything. Boys, girls, or anyone in between."

No labels. That sounded good enough for Yuuri. Anything to explain the occasional need for makeup and blouses and bras.

Four months later, Yuuri found an accurate label.

Nonbinary sounded like music to his ears.

6\. He does some things that I do, and he's not ashamed at all.

Viktor Nikiforov stimmed. A lot. He was constantly moving on and off the ice, although his on-ice moves were admittedly more graceful than his off-ice moves. That's what made him so beautifully relatable.

Yuuri watched the live streams on his laptop, where Viktor would walk around the rink the newest competition would be held, occasionally bumping into reporters and fans and competitors. Viktor was kind to all of them, answering questions, taking selfies with fans, and wishing the best to the skaters. This friendliness could all be an act, but Yuuri tried not to dwell on it. Viktor was only human, after all, and even if he was in a bad mood, he'd probably still put on a smile, like most celebrities do.

Yuuri watched Viktor twirl through the halls like a ballerina, skipping and clapping and nodding. Yuuri hoped he was seeing the truly happy Viktor Nikiforov because he happened to move exactly like him.

Yuuri smiled at Viktor on the screen, who was showing everyone a picture of his dogs, Makkachin, as he rambled on and on about the history of poodles. Now Yuuri knew that poodles were supposed to have originated in Germany. There were three types- standard, miniature, and toy. Apparently poodle fur never stopped growing.

When Yuuri saw Viktor rocking hypnotically in a wooden chair, he wondered about the last time he did that. He wasn't sure why he had stopped, really. Insecurity, probably.

Then Yuuri realized he was sitting in a chair right now. Smirking almost rebelliously, he decided to start rocking.

If Yuuri ever met Viktor, he'd thank him for being an inspiration. Not only as a skater, but as an autistic one.

7\. He doesn't hide who he is.

Yuuri forgot about the list. It stayed folded in an old magazine for years. The magazine was cramped behind the bed, presumably stuck before someone noticed the wrinkled paper and pulled it free.

"Yuuri?" Viktor asked, holding out the dusty paper in front of him as if it were contagious. "What's this? Looks old."

Yuuri squinted at it, unsure at first. "Hmm. Is that a list?"

Once his brain processed the messy Japanese writing on the paper, he shrieked with shock.

Viktor looked concerned at the clear anxiety in Yuuri's face. "Huh? What's wrong, star?"

Yuuri blushed, not just because of the nickname. "Oh, it's, uh, ah-" How could Yuuri explain this? Even though Viktor knew about him being a fan for many years, this list was personal and a lot to take in.

Yuuri took some deep breaths, trying to lower his heart rate. Viktor would never judge him. Even though this list was a tad embarrassing, it was from when he was younger. Viktor would find it cute. Anxiety aside, the real logical reason why Yuuri was hesitant to show the list was because number 7 was not innocently written when he was a child at all. In fact, he wrote it when he was twenty.

"This is... a list of the things I admire about you."

There was a few seconds of silence, where Viktor's expression was unreadable. Then his eyes became wet and his mouth became a heart and he started spinning joyfully. "Oh, Yuuri! That's adorable! What does it say?"

Yuuri smiled, memories piecing back together in his memory like a puzzle. So he held his husband in his arms after they sat on their big comfy chair, rocking slowly as Yuuri translated the page.

**Author's Note:**

> I was thinking about writing some autistic Yurio Plisetsky next. I'm open to any suggestions! Please tell me what you want to read (about Yuri or any other characters) and I will try my best to write it! Give me prompts :)


End file.
